inconsistent

So, I've come to the realization that I've been growing more and more lazy with this blog, which is the exact opposite effect I wanted it to have. Instead of getting my ideas out, I've been keeping them in my head, hiding them from ever seeing the light of my computer screen. There are a lot of projects and ideas that I have in my head, but it seems like I just don't have enough time/energy/enthusiasm to tackle them all.

A few of scripts (one for a game, one for a movie, one for a short film), a bi-weekly (or is it bi-monthly? Does anyone know which means every two weeks?) story posted to relyonhorror.com, a novel I've been working on for a while but just haven't gotten around to finishing. Then there are other things going ideas going around in my head; reading more from House of Leaves (which is awesome, by the way), writing that survival horror comparison/review article about Tomb Raider, submitting that children's book entry for that contest. Then, not to mention the fact that I need to be filling out job applications, so I can find a way to start bringing in some real money again. All of that, and the only thing I've really managed to do in these past few weeks is take a nap. 

Sure, I can make the excuse that Steph is home for the summer and I'm spending as much time with her as I can, which is true, but there's something more to it. Part of me is afraid to start diving into these ideas, overwhelmed at the thought of the amount of work it's going to take to make them come to life, let alone the thought of any of them failing. So, I hide my anxiety in these excuses, but I'm tired of hiding. I'm tired of being inconsistent. Maybe updating this blog will be the first step. 

BC