Dianne... The Black Lodge sucks

First, let me apologize for my absence from the blog; while I could go on making up excuses for why I've bailed when I explicitly said I wouldn't, I've decided to just start doing what I've come here to do, and that is to write about shit that most people probably don't even care about, and wait to see how many people read it, only to be disappointed by that low, low number. So, here we go. 

I've been in a heavy "Twin Peaks mood" lately, and while I'm tempted to watch the series for a 3rd time, the show carries something of a bitter sweet memory for me. Meeting Coop and the residents of Twin Peaks is something I wouldn't want to go through life without having done, and I recommend everyone watches the show at least once, but I cannot get over how it ended. Do you have to put a spoiler alert for a show that ended over 20 years ago?

*************SPOILER ALERT**************

I know, I know. People will try to act like they "understand" the reasoning behind the ending of the series, and that it's "better that way" with Cooper's uncertain fate, but those people can fuck off. Sure, a lot of stories got tied up by the end of the series, but what the hell happens to Cooper!? Then, that prick David Lynch makes a prequel/sequel movie, but does it clear up the ending at all? Nope. More ambiguity concerning Cooper's demise/triumph. That doesn't sit well with me. Well, Laura Palmer (her father killed her (I said spoilers)) said that Agent Dale Cooper would be stuck in The Black Lodge for "25 years," which should be coming up right around now. What a better time to start gearing up for a TV return to that wonderful little town that we (me and 4 other people) all love?

Well, about 6 months back, there were actually rumors that this would be the case. I was all set to throw on a fresh pot of coffee and book my room at the Great Northern, but I've just read that there will indeed be no proper ending to this story. In a day and age when we have about 6 different "Real Housewife" shows, Netflix exclusive series are booming, and shows that borrow directly from Twin Peaks are thriving, it makes no sense to me that there will be no third and final season. I guess I just don't get the entertainment business. 

It just doesn't seem fair; that's not regarding me (okay, it is; I'm selfish and I want my damn ending), it's for all of those people out there who have never experienced this wonderful show at all and probably never will, and for them, I feel truly sorry. They will never see Bobby Briggs go from a rebellious kid, to a young man who gains his fathers respect, or Ben Horne lose his mind and pretend his in the Civil War, or James and his terrible, terrible singing, or Audrey actually find love, or Norma turning into a silent drapes-superhero. Or Big Ed, Andy and Lucy, The Man From Another Place? Has anyone ever played a better cross-dresser than David Duchovny? How about that old guy who keeps giving Coop a thumbs-up? I nearly pissed myself. 

Well, that's all from me for tonight; it looks like I'm gonna watch some Twin Peaks after all... right after I get this damn fish out of the percolator.